“When I express my disagreement, do I do so explicitly and respectfully?” The question poses a powerful and needed reflection. Self-honesty is a necessity to answer the question; which can provide its own problems to certain people. Being inquisitive and questioning yourself is also very important. When asking myself this question, I plan on doing all of those.
As hard as I try, I do not always express my disagreement respectfully. I am typically always explicit with my disagreements. When explicit clashes with disrespect, it can cause an aggressive argument that ends with no settlement. This is where self-honesty comes into play. When I was a young child, I had an issue dealing with disagreement. I could become very angry over the topic at hand, which would turn into a belligerent lash-out. Luckily, this most typically would happen with my siblings. The situation could be navigated via my parents. Although, the second most occurring area in which I would let my anger get the best of me is in sports. At the first instance of frustration, I would become very angry with myself. This would lead to altercations with teammates, coaches, and opposing players. Even though it did not happen as much as I make it out to be, it happened enough to become an issue. Luckily, I was blessed with parents that care and are very active in my life. They did their best to help me with the issue. My dad would explain how he dealt with the same problem when he was younger, and how he managed to overcome it. It was nice to have a relatable figure that I look up to helping me. It did not happen overnight, but I slowly became able to face my disagreements with an open mind and with less frustration. It started out as a suppression of anger, but evolved into an absence of anger. With the help of my parents, I have become much better at respectfully facing disagreements.
Although I have become much better at facing disagreements, I am sure that I am not perfect. I have to constantly ask myself how to handle situations. For example, a common frustration I face is the constant topic of race being discussed. I personally believe that a large reason race has placed itself as issue is because it gets spoken of so often. Although, many people do not share the same belief. When I want to argue that, I usually get scared that my frustration will get the best of me. In order to not be disrespectful, I typically stay quiet. That is something I could improve on. Instead of avoiding disagreement, I need to confront it in a respectful manner that gets my point across.